Jace's World
by Iron Matron
Summary: ONE SHOT. What made Jace decide at the end of COA to just be a brother and give up his pursuit for them to be more. Why suddenly so selfless? I want to explore a moment I think has gone greatly overlooked.


**DISCLAIMER:** _I own nothing on MI. Just wish i did. It's really nice we get to play with the world, though. Don't take this for granted. :)_

**Chapter 1**

Jace screams for Clary. He watches as a wave of water sweeps her up like a little doll. A suprises scream is cut short by the water. Through an opening on the hull she was gone. Jace only has a split second to register before more water is barreling towards him and Simon. He swings around and pushes Simon up the stairs where an opening has been torn through another side of the ship. Though all his training part of his mind is still able to focus on several steps ahead. Get off the ship. Keep Simon out of the water. Find Clary in the water.

Jace take a quick look out the hol. Spots a large piece of floating debris. Tosses Simon who makes a helpless yelp as he goes flying through the air landing perfectly in the center of the huge makeshift raft. Jace chances a quick look behind him, but knows she won't be there. He leeps into the water feet first and goes deep into the murky dark river.

There is barely any visibility, but he looks around anyway. The water is chaos. Demons sinking into the pitch black void; clawing the water for purchase but failing. Jace feels nothing for them. There are Shadowhunters powering their way to the surface; slicing demons as the rise. Jace can only hold his breath for so long and has to surface. He saw no trace of Clary. She has to already be on the surface or maybe already rescued. Jace giggles in his head. She's probably insisting on swimming the other way just to spit him.

Jace breaks the surface and take a deep breath. Simon is clinging to the scrap right in front of him; like some prettified little puppy. Jace grabs the sides and starts padding towards the truck where Luke is standing in the bed.

Simon leaps for the bed and Luke grabs his arm. They shares a look. Then Simon looks back at the ship and it is completely on fire lighting up sky. And there are chunks of ship tearing apeart and falling into the water. Luke looks at Jace; "what did you guys do?"

Jace hoists himself out of the water to sit on the edgee of the bed; "Have you seen Clary? We found her on the ship, but she was washed overboard." Jace doesn't mention Clary is what caused the ship to tear apart.

Simon sees something floating in the water; just a lump of black. He directs Luke over to it. Jace frantically grabs the jacket clad figure with his lightning speed and hauls it into the bed. It's tiny figure and he spots the red hair darkened by the water. Clary.

Her lips are blue and her skin is white. She feels frozen to the touch. _How long was she in the water? 5 min? 10?_ Jace's mind scrambles think clearly as Luke start CPR. Luke is pumping her chest and looks at Jace; "I need your help. Come on," Jace kicks into gear and breathes air into her lungs. Simon watches as they work on her; his hands in his hair.

"Come on Clary" Luke controls his strength perfectly as he continues to compress her heart forcing it to pump blood through her viens. But Jace can hear the desperation in his voice. It mirrors the fear in his own heart. Luke looks up at Jace. Their eyes lock and Jace knows. She's lost. She was lost before got her on the boat. Jace bends over so delicately and presses a kiss to her parted lips and pulls back just so he is a breath from her face. He gently brushes her red locks, drying in the air, away from her face. He feels his tenuous grip on his emotions failing as he presses one hand to her cheek and touches his forehead to her's. The lets go of her completely.

Jace crawls over to the edge of the bed on his knees. He rest one hand on the bed and the other covers his face. Hot tears sting his eyes and he begins to silently weep. Uncontrollable wracking sobs soon escape him as his whole body convulsive. She was gone. His Clary. Forever. He is oblivious to the cheers as more shadowhunters are rescued from the water and the wreck of Valentine's ship continues to break apart.

Simon walks over and rests a hand on Jace's shoulder. Jace doesn't even acknowledge his presence as he feels his world shrink and fade. Simon walks over to Luke and they discuss the situation of the rescue coordination. Luke can barely keep track of the conversation and Simon is not doing well, either. They both keep glancing back at Clary; but neither wants to mention it. They finally just stop talking as Luke collapses on the tire, hanging his head.

Jace continues to sob on the corner of the bed. He head so low his hair occasionally dips in the water. He contemplates falling in again...and just continuing to fall. Couldn't he has dove after her? Couldn't he has reached out and grabbed her? Why did he let her go? He could see her obstinate face. Her gorgeous eyes dancing as he said something selfish. How had she claimed so much of him in such a short time.

Then he heard a cough. A tiny little, delicate, entirely feminine cough. He sucked in a breath and turned to look over his shoulder. Luke and Simon heard it had scrambled over to Clary where she was laying in the bed of the truck. breathing.

BREATHING. Clary had her eyes squinted shut and her body was shuddering as she coughed and tried to breath. Luke and Simon both started talking at once; "Clary?! hey, she's ok." "Clary, sweety, it's Luke. How ya doing?"

Where's Jace?" Jace's heart flipped. She'd been close to dead and her only thought was if he was ok. He struggled to pull himself together. There was his image, after all. And it would do her no good to know how close she'd been to seeing heaven in person.

"He's all right; isn't he?" Clary's voice was frantic. God it was like music to hear her voice. "Where is he? _Where is he_?!"

Jace scrambled over to her side; still trying pull himself back from the brink. He couldn't help it. "I'm here. I'm sorry. I should have been here when you woke up. It's just..." He felt his voice crack and stopped. He almost broke down again. He wanted scooped her in his arms to hold her forever. to tell her he would protect her from everything. How sorry he was he almost failed. He wanted to pour his heart out and tell her how much he loved her.

But there was company. And she was still his sister. Platonic had never been a such a terrible word as when it was associated with woman who owned your heart. And now he knew. No one would ever come close to inciting the type of emotion this little slip of a girl could cause.

She was the love of his life. He vowed to himself to protect her; to raise hell or destroy heaven to keep her safe. Even it it meant burying his feelings so she could be happy and move on. His world would be to see her's thrive.

He smiled. She was his world.

**I kept thinking when I read this part of COA and then the end there was something missing here. this was the moment Jace decided he would just be her brother at the cost of his own happiness. because god gave her back. I need to re-write more to include the deal he send to heaven to bring her back and if they did he would just be here brother. I'll get to that . . . next week. tell me what you think of the draft.**


End file.
